So what's up with Cutting?

What images do you think of when you hear that word? A stupid chick who should just kill herself? An attention whore? A girl who has lost hope? Someone so emotionally scarred? An emo person? What do you say when someone mentions that word? Do you remain silent? Do you condemn the cutters? Maybe you mock them? Or are you one who defends them. 

Most people call them attention whores and tell them they should just die. Others take no stand and some people defend the cutters. What is cutting really? It is so much deeper than the act of driving a sharp object through your skin. It symbolises so much more that just scars on a part of the body. These wounds are emotional and they run deeper then the cuts themselves. These cutters, the people you accuse of being emo, attention whores and stupid are so broken and in a great deal of emotional pain. Most of them hide their scars under layers of clothes and accessories and their pain behind a smile. You always see them so happy and full of life. They are the strong ones, the ones who cheer you up. They are the ones who also have a secret. They are so hurt and broken, the only way the can relieve the pain is to inflict a physical pain to counter that. It is unhealthy yes to do that, but it is the only way they know how. It's all about control and they inflict the pain on themselves because it's the one thing that they can control right now. 

The others, who people call “fake cutters”. Yeah, the ones who do it for attention, they need help too. They have such a wrapped sense of reality that by having a  disorder of some sort will make them popular and loved. No! The popular girls were always the ones who were perfect and had no disorders.

Now, what about you, do you have friends that cut? Do you yell at them and get frustrated? Are you worried about their safety? Do you feel burdened? 
Lets be honest here. I bet you, you found out your friend cuts. She did not want to tell you and she tried lying with all her might but you saw the truth. Well, congratz. Here is a news flash for you. You can’t tell a dancer not to dance or a bird not to fly. Likewise you can’t just tell someone who cuts to stop. They won’t and they can’t. They will struggle and if you think it is a burden that your friend cuts, she has it even worse. She is embarrassed that someone knows and is unlikely to open up. All you can do is support her and be there for her. Talk to her and listen to her. It makes a difference.

Allow me to take you into the mind of a person who cuts.

They are plagued by thoughts of being imperfect or stressed out or emotionally exhausted. They can’t cope with their situation. So what do they do? They cut. Most times, they do it instinctively not really knowing what they are doing. It like you have  a headache and you reach for a  Panadol or Advil to soothe it. Same thing. They reach for their knives, blades or whatever. They just want the pain to stop. When it is over, the feel so guilty and ashamed. They are weighed down by the fact that they were not strong enough to win their battles. They feel so unworthy and imperfect. They worry of what people will think of them after knowing their dark little secret. They were suppose to be strong. How dare they break. So they hide. They act like everything is okay when deep inside, they have unresolved emotions. 

To the cutters, I just want to say:

I know what it feels like to have no hope. I know that people tell you it gets better and you just can’t see the possibility of it getting better. Let me tell you this, you ARE strong and beautiful. You DESERVE to be loved and you are WORTH IT! Don’t let anyone tell you otherwise. I want you to look at those angry red scars that litter your arms, legs, hips or wherever. I want you to acknowledge them. I want you to know that, with time the scars WILL heal. You just have to let go. Now, put your blade down and smile. Cry if you want to. Just let it all out. Next time you feel the need to cut, write, sing or do something else. Now, I want you to draw a butterfly on your wrist. Don’t wash it off. If you cut, the butterfly dies. Let it fade away naturally. Make it your goal to save a butterfly and keep drawing one till you are better. Its okay if you don’t make it at first. We all make mistakes. Its my butterfly to you cause I do care.